Ending My Love Affair With Cigarettes (Part 2)

The First Three Weeks


Well let me start by saying that I have never felt more insane than I did two weeks ago. To have so many stresses in my life going on at the same exact time I am trying not to smoke was just crazy. My mother had a heart attack after having a basic gall bladder surgery. My phone wont stop ringing because bill collectors have to call all day long, every day, reminding me just how much my life sucks financially. Feeling stress because I haven't even started school clothes shopping for my boys yet, and I truly have no idea how I am coming up with the money to even start, let alone finish it.  Then had some baby daddy drama on top of it. So even though these things are not the worst life crisis (except for my mothers heart attack, that floored me), not being on my anti-depressants and now detoxing my body from the nicotine just seemed to be bad timing.

So you probably wondering how I got through the last three weeks. Well I will share: I slept a lot. I do mean a lot. I took 3 to 4 hour naps during the day, and then I would sleep 6 to 10 hours at night. So half my day was spent sleeping. If I wasn't sleeping then I was snacking. I tried having Twizzlers in the house but I ate them to quickly and got sick from over eating.  I tried pieces of fruit but that caused bathroom issues. I tried chewing on a pen, but had one explode in my mouth. I spent a lot of time snapping at my kids, bill collectors and avoiding the world. I been cleaning a lot. My walls have never been cleaner..lol.  A few of my FB friends are quitting too, so we encourage each other. I have been receiving a lot of support from my family and friends, and that has help greatly and I am truly grateful.

I will say that each day does get easier, just like everyone  has told me it would. The cravings are limited to just a few certain activities (drinking coffee, after meals, sitting by the bonfire. etc). Don't get me wrong, there are still days that the cravings are extremely intense and I could kill the world for just one drag, however I know this feeling is going to pass and I have been able to tough it out. I am still trying to find that one thing I can do that will replace the cravings all together with out becoming another negative addiction, because obviously I have an addictive personality and need to proceed with caution.